Say That You Love Me
by julesmk
Summary: They don't consider themselves best of friends, they fight, they bicker, but when needed, they are there for each other. So when Deeks is left at the altar on his wedding day, Kensi is there for him. Will this be the start of something more for them? A Densi AU. Disclaimer: I do not own any NCISLA Characters.
1. Chapter 1

June 11, 2011

Deeks entered the room to the surprise of the waiting guests. He went straight to the front, grabbed the microphone on the stand and uttered the words he had not expected to say in this what meant to be a momentous event of his life.

"I'm sorry but the wedding is cancelled."

He threw the microphone recklessly on the floor after and without throwing a look at any of the flabbergasted crowd, he strode out. He didn't know where to go, didn't even know what to do next. All he can think of was the need to leave that place. He needed to get away as far as he can before his weakening knees betray him and before any of the people who heard him speak can ask further questions he didn't think he was ready to answer.

Deeks walked with large steps ignoring the guests' sympathetic look as he passed by them. He heard a few who whispered with each other discreetly. When he reached the outside, his body slumped on the cemented ground. Tears that have been threatening to fall since he found out the terrible news have began wetting his face. Passersby were eyeing him strangely but he didn't care. He was sad. He had a right to cry.

"Deeks."

A gentle voice called his name as two hands helped him up. He knew its owner, been working side by side with her for two years now.

He looked at her and confirmed that he was right. "Kensi." He weakly whispered the name of his partner.

"I'm here."

Deeks noticed she, too, had tears on her beautiful hazel brown eyes. She was crying with him, her own heart was breaking for his misfortune. He stood up, leaned on her body, one arm settled around her shoulders. Kensi held it and wrapped her free arm on his waist. They walked towards her car. His partner sat him on the passenger seat and she moved quickly around the vehicle to climbed in the driver seat. Without words, she drove him away. Away from what his supposed to be happy ending but now a painful recollection he wished he won't remember.

()()()

Almost 2 weeks later

"Still no plan on leaving, Ms. Blye?"

Hetty's voice startled her. She was too focused on the report she was writing that she didn't noticed her boss was already behind her.

"I'm just finishing this."

The older woman nodded. "How's Mr. Deeks?"

She knew a question about her partner will come up next. "I don't know." She shook her head sadly.

She honestly didn't know. It had been almost two weeks since his cancelled wedding and Deeks had not reported on his job since.

She understood his despression. He was about to marry the woman he was sure he fell in love with for the first time in his life. Kensi had witnessed the good change on her partner after meeting Zoey, a real estate agent, a year prior. For the first time, she saw that he can be a better man, be more than the happy go lucky guy she knew and had been partner with for two years now. Zoey brought out the best in Deeks and she was happy for them.

Her partner's proposal on his girlfriend surprised Kensi. Not that she wasn't supportive of their budding relationship but because that's just it, budding. Their relationship was just starting. They were on two dates before they became boyfriend and girlfriend officially. 7 months onto the relationship, Deeks proposed. Zoey agreed to marry him. And 3 months later, a wedding was about to happen. Theirs was a whirlwind romance. A romance based on briefly knowing each other. Kensi tried to comprehend that maybe they were too in love to think about the other areas of their relationship.

She had her apprehensions, felt that something wasn't right. It seemed that Deeks and Zoey rushed into things. Although she wished now that she talked to him about it, she knew there was nothing different she can do. They were in love. Or at least Deeks was. Zoey left Deeks 30 minutes before the wedding ceremony and eloped with her ex boyfriend. That was based on her written note her maid of honor found on the bridal suite.

Kensi clenched her jaw in displeasure that didn't came unnoticed to her boss.

"You seem to be mad, Ms. Blye." Hetty voiced out her observation, eyes fixed on the young agent.

She sighed louder than she was supposed to. "I'm sorry, Hetty. I hate that this happened."

"We all do, Ms. Blye." The older woman answered, giving her a nod in understanding.

Kensi knew her boss was right. They, Hetty, Callen, Sam, Eric and Nell, all detested that this happened to one of them. They have been a witness too on Deeks and Zoey's romance. Even if, like her, they shared doubts over the couple's quick wedding plan, they backed him up and never voiced out their qualms.

()()()

"I know you're in there, Deeks. Please open up."

She rested her forehead on the door in sadness. Kensi had been knocking on her partner's front door and calling his name for 15 minutes now. She knew he was inside, she can hear his cellphone ringing from her countless calls.

"Deeks."

Glancing at the locked knob, picking it entered her mind but chose not to. She didn't want to break her partner's trust. She was worried for him, she had no idea how he was after she drove him there when she found him crying outside the chapel 13 days ago.

"Okay, I'll come back again tomorrow night." She uttered loud enough so that he can hear her.

She was resolved to come again tomorrow night like she had been doing these past 13 days. Every night, after work, she was stopping by his home wanting to make sure that he was still okay. But during those nights, he never answered her calls nor opened his door for her. And this night was no different, she concluded. Thinking that he still wasn't ready to see her, Kensi decided to leave. She turned around and began walking towards her car.

She was on her second step when she heard the creaking sound from the door being opened. Instantly, her head went to its direction.

"Deeks!"

Kensi ran to her partner and caught him just in time.

"Deeks?!" She mumbled his name, her arms cradling his fallen body on the ground.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Thank you for your reviews, follows and favorites.

()()()

 _June 11, 2011_

 _She took a deep breath to calm herself before entering the chapel. Once inside, she stopped for a while and wandered her eyes around the crowded room. She saw some guests from Deeks' LAPD precinct and others were probably from Zoey's side._

" _Looks like it's going to be a joyous occasion." She said to herself, taking notice of the smile on everyone's face._

 _Kensi ran her fingers on the soft fabric of her burgundy gown, her other hand was gripping her black clutch tightly. This was not the first time she was invited to a friend's wedding. At her age, she had been with several already but the apprehension she was having at the moment made her wonder._

' _What is with Deeks' wedding that makes her feel like this?'_

 _Speaking of her partner, Kensi thought where he could be. The last time she saw him was two nights ago after the team threw him a surprise bachelor party in one of the hottest bars in LA. She smiled at the memory of their last conversation when she drove him to his place after the bash._

 _()()()_

 _Kensi parked her car in front of her partner's house and stepped out to open his door for him. She smirked when she saw him passed out._

" _Deeks, wake up!" She poked his shoulder that earned her a groan from him. "Come on, you're home."_

 _He lazily opened his eyes and smiled upon seeing her. "Kensalina!"_

 _She tried not to roll her eyes at one of his plenty of nicknames for her, remembering the promise the entire team forced her to make that she will be extra kind and forgiving to him today in celebration for his upcoming wedding. "Yeah, yeah it's me. Come on."_

 _With her help, Deeks stepped out of the car and to her shock, wrapped his arms around her. "Thank you, Kensi." He muttered. His tone was serious to her surprise. "You are a great partner."_

" _And you are drunk." She retorted._

 _He chuckled as he pulled away from_ _her placing_ _both of his hands on her shoulders and gazing at her. "I'm serious. You are the best partner in the world and I want you to know that."_

 _Kensi was astounded. This was the first time he said those words to her._

 _Having been partnered with him was no joke. She always thought of him as an immature and irresponsible man who jested most of the time even when things were serious. He was the opposite of her. According to him, she took things too critically and was very tightly wounded._

 _"Deeks." That was all she can say._

 _He smiled at her and tucked some loose strands of her hair behind her ear. "Thank you again. See you at the wedding."_

" _O-Of course."_

" _Goodnight, Kensi."_

 _She saw his face leaned down on her and in no time, his lips touched her cheek. She swore her heart skipped a beat at Deeks' action. Feeling grateful that it was dark, Kensi was able to hide her flushing. "G-goodnight."_

 _Unknowingly, she trailed her fingers on her cheek as she watched her partner walked to his front door, trying his best not to stumble._

 _This wasn't the first time he kissed her, they have done it in several undercover operations before. She knew how his lips tasted and felt. She knew he was a good kisser. But this was the first time he kissed her as him and out of work. It left her startled._

 _()()()_

" _Kensi! Here!"_

 _Nell's voice brought her out of her thoughts. She saw the analyst waving at her. With the redhead were_ _Hetty, Sam's wife Michelle and daughter Kam. They were occupying one of the pews not so far from the altar. She paced towards them and greeted them._

 _Callen, Sam, and Eric were Deeks' groom's men and they were inside with him._

 _"You look beautiful, Ms. Blye." Hetty commented._

 _"Thanks, Hetty." She blushed a little._

 _Michelle and Nell grinned at her._

 _"I thought I'm going to be late. Have you seen Deeks?"_

 _Nell shook her head. "He's inside, waiting for his bride."_

 _Kensi glanced at her watch, the wedding will start in 15 minutes. "Zoey isn't here yet?"_

 _Michelle answered her. "Sam said she's on her way."_

 _She nodded. "I'm going to the restroom."_

 _"I'll come with you." Nell said._

 _()()()_

" _How are you?"_

 _Kensi was putting lipstick on her lips when she heard Nell's question. She turned to her redhead friend curiously. "What do you mean how am I?"_

" _This." The analyst began, waving her hands on her front. "Deeks getting married, how are you feeling about it?" Nell focused her eyes on her, examining her and Kensi felt edgy all of a sudden._

 _She tried to laugh. "What are you saying? Of course I'm happy for him. I can't say much for Zoey though, you know. I think she can still do better." She quipped although deep inside she knew Zoey was one lucky woman because Deeks was a wonderful guy._

 _When Kensi noticed that the analyst eyed her seriously, she worried. "Is everything alright?"_

 _Nell seemed to be upset. "It's nothing."_

" _Hey, is there something going on you're not telling me?"_

" _I just want to make sure you're fine."_

" _Why wouldn't I be fine? Deeks will be back after his honeymoon, nothing will change. Except that he can no longer join us on our bar trips after work because he needs to go home to his wife. And he'll be sporting a wedding band on his ring finger." Kensi didn't know why her chest tightened at her last sentence._

" _Yeah." Nell said, her face showing a little bit of dismay. "I'll head out first."_

" _Okay." She shrugged._

 _When Nell left the restroom, Kensi stared at her reflection on the mirror. She flashed a smile but it didn't reached her eyes._

' _I'm happy for him. For them.'_

 _()()()_

 _After fixing herself, she went out the bathroom to go back to her companions but decided to find her partner first to congratulate him. Reaching the room where Deeks was in, Kensi immediately sensed something was wrong._

" _No!"_

 _Kensi was stunned to hear his pained yell from the inside and was about to open the door when it burst open and Deeks exited hastily. He didn't saw her when he walked past her. His best man, David, his good friend from LAPD, and all his groom's men_ _followed him as Deeks went inside the chapel. Kensi joined them and got the surprise of her life._

 _Her hand flew to her mouth in shock when she heard Deeks' announcement._

 _"Oh my God!"_

 _Tears shed from her eyes as she watched him exiting, pain was evident on his face. She looked at everyone and saw some were motionless, clearly stunned on what just happened, while others questioned the person next to them if what they heard was right._

 _Without thinking twice, she ran to follow Deeks._

 _()()()_

 _More tears dropped from her eyes when she saw her partner on the ground weeping._

 _"Deeks."_

 _She crouched on his side to help him stand._

 _He tilted his head to look at her. "Kensi."_

 _"I'm here."_

 _Slowly, she_ _guided him to her car. She didn't know where to go to after, didn't know what to do to the man crying next to her. Knowing Deeks, she decided to bring him to the only place she knew he can relax._

 _Beach._

 _()()()_

 _They reached the beach in silence. After she stopped the car, Deeks ran to the shore. Kensi can only watch him when he fell near the water. She followed him but stopped feet away. Her heart was breaking at the scene in front of her._

 _Deeks on the ground, head bowed down._

 _She can hear his sobs and it brought tears in her eyes._

 _'Why does my heart aches for him?' She silently asked herself._

 _She can't consider him her best friend because they were too different. But he was a friend, a good friend who had her back in the field. She trusted him with her life and she knew he did the same for her._

 _But the pain she was feeling for him was too much for just a good friend. She wanted, if she could, to take away his agony. If she had the power to remove his suffering, she would have used it by now._

 _Kensi sat on the sand and watched her partner cry. After quite some time, Deeks wiped his tears, lifted his head and stared at the ocean in front of him. She noticed he was staring off in space._

 _She immediately stood up and fixed herself when he turned to her and smiled. Kensi came to him and settled on his left._

 _He laid his head on her shoulder wordlessly. When she glanced at him, his eyes were closed. They remained in that position for God knows how long._

 _Kensi's back was aching for the lack of movement. She was afraid to move, afraid to disturb him. The view on her front caught her eyes. The sunset was beautiful calming her suddenly. It was as if it promised her that tomorrow will be different, a new and brighter day will come._

 _A child's scream awoken Deeks. He jolted on his position and fluttered his eyes open instantly._

 _"I'm sorry. I didn't realize-"_

 _"It's okay." She cut him as she stretched her back. Kensi glanced at him. His eyes were puffy._

 _Seeing that she was in a strapless gown, Deeks removed his coat and spread it across her bare shoulders._

 _"Thanks."_

 _"Here." He said as he handed her a paper he took from one of his pockets._

 _She opened it, it was the handwritten note Zoey left for Deeks. Kensi read it silently. "I-I'm sorry." Her voice was shaking after reading it, locking her eyes on him._

 _He may have noticed her tears because Kensi felt his fingers wiping them gently._

 _"Stop." He whispered softly. "Don't cry, Kensi."_

 _"I can't help it."_

 _"Ssshh. It's okay." Deeks pulled her for an embrace._

 _"I'm sorry, Deeks." Kensi hugged him tight. "I'm sorry."_

 _()()()_

 _It was already dark when she drove him home._

 _Before he can open his side door, she put her hand on his arm to stop him._

 _"Wait."_

 _He turned to her but didn't ask any question._

 _She hesitated at first but decided to continue. "Would you want me to accompany you? I mean..." She felt stupid for the lack of words._

 _This moment was very unlike them, she thought. Kensi recalled instances in the bullpen when she and Deeks were talking at the same time, both having things to say but none was willing to listen. They could go on like that for minutes until Callen or Sam will had enough and will_ _tell_ _them to shut up. And then they will gaze at each other in annoyance._

 _A sad smile formed on his lips, he placed his hand on hers. "Thank you Kensi." He stated already knowing what she wanted to say. "I think I need to be alone for a while."_

 _"I understand. If you need anything..." Again, she was out of words._

 _"I know."_

 _Kensi was surprised at herself when she wrapped her arms around him for a hug. "I-I'm sorry, Deeks." She felt like crying again but did her best to hold it back. He wouldn't want to see her weep once more._

 _"Thank you." Deeks mumbled returning her embrace._

 _They stayed in that position until Kensi felt the need to let go._

 _He stepped out in silence, glancing and smiling at her faintly before entering his home._

 _She made sure that he was inside before driving away._


	3. Chapter 3

Deeks opened his eyes and confusion began to creep in him when he found himself lying comfortably on his bed. He had no idea why he ended up in his bedroom. The last thing he remembered was opening the door for his partner.

"Kensi." He mumbled her name as he sat up, combing his messy hair with his fingers in the process.

Flashbacks of the past nights entered his mind. He recalled how she had been knocking on his door, whispering his name and calling his cellphone plenty of times every night for the past 13 days. But still wanting to be left alone, he never entertained Kensi and he felt bad doing that to her.

The second night she knocked on his door and left unsuccessfully, Deeks regretted his action when he heard her sad sigh before retreating back to her car. He wanted to open his door for her but he didn't want to face her yet. He had been alone in his place since Zoey left him, wasting his time drinking, crying and brooding over his failed wedding. He knew he needed to get over it somehow but right now, he still didn't know how.

"You're awake."

Kensi walked in her partner's bedroom and saw him staring into space. Holding a tray of hot soup and water, she strode towards him. She placed the tray at the nightstand before sitting on the bed.

"How are you?" Smiling, she asked him as she touched his forehead. Her face brightened in relief after feeling that he was not as hot as he was hours ago. "Your fever dropped."

When she caught him on his doorsteps, Kensi was stunned to see her partner. He was a mess, his hair was unkept, his clothes were dirty, he was drunk and burning with fever. She almost dialled 911 in panic but thought Deeks wouldn't want to wake up in a hospital so she decided to try taking care of him for the meantime.

Kensi struggled in bringing him back inside the house noting that unconscious Deeks was heavy. After several attempts, she found a way. Slowly and carefully, she successfully brought him to his room and settled him on the bed. She gave him a lukewarm sponging, changed his clothes and made him drink his medicine. A sad smile formed on her lips when she remembered who he was calling in his sleep.

 _()()()_

 _She just finished changing Deeks' clothes and was now_ _fixing his blanket atop his body when she heard his murmur._

 _"Zoey..."_

 _It was almost inaudible but Kensi heard it clear. He was calling his fiancée._

 _Feeling his forehead, she silently hoped that the medicine she gave him will start_ _taking effect because his fever was still high and he was beginning to chill._

 _"Zoey..."_

 _Kensi sat on the bed and ran her fingers through his hair, stroking it as gently as she can. "Everything will be alright, Deeks." She said in a low voice._

 _She was surprised when with_ _his eyes still close, he grabbed her hand from his hair and tugged it under his neck, holding it tightly as if his life depends on it. "Zo..." He whispered one last time before succumbing to sleep._

 _She remained seated until she was able to pull her hand away from him when he moved. Despite knowing that Deeks thought of him as his fiancée, Kensi was glad that she helped him in some way._

 _Exiting his room, she was welcomed by the sight of her partner's chaotic living room. There were clutters everywhere, empty beer bottles and his dirty clothes were spread all over in what once was a neat place. Unlike her, he was a clean guy wanting everything in order. Deeks even teased her about her hoarding capability one time. Of course it didn't come without a price, a punched instantly landed on his arm after he said that to her._

 _And now seeing how Deeks and his home were a mess, hate grew in her heart for Zoey._

 _'How can she hurt him when all he did was loved her?' She wanted to ask_ _the woman._

 _It pained her to_ _see how broken her partner was. His cancelled wedding left him devastated and she can only hope that someday, Deeks can move on from it._

 _Trying to focus her mind on helping her partner and not hating the woman who abandoned him, Kensi decided that it was best if she clean while she's there. It didn't last long when the room was empty with clutters and all the dirty clothes were on the washing machine._

 _She brought out a_ _can of soup from_ _the kitchen cabinet and placed it on the counter, making her see them from time to time. She wanted to feed Deeks with it when he woke up._

 _()()()_

"Thank you for this, Kensi." Deeks said after finishing his bowl of soup.

At first, his partner wanted to feed him but he insisted that he can eat by himself. Kensi let go in the end.

"Welcome. You're lucky you have canned soup on your pantry or else I will make you eat my version of noodle soup." She said giving him a wink.

For the first time in almost two weeks, he laughed genuinely imagining how things would have been different if she prepared the food. Kensi was not known for her kitchen skills, accidentally slipping to him one time how she tried boiling eggs but ended up burning them.

Kensi smiled hearing her partner's laugh. She missed it. She didn't want to admit it but she missed him, his baby blues, his shaggy blonde hair, the way he teased her and her hitting him in retaliation after. She missed everything about him and she marveled on how he meant more to her than she realized.

"How's work?"

She was pulled from her trance when Deeks spoke. "Nothing new. Solved some cases."

"How's everyone?"

"Well, Callen lose a bet to Hetty. Again." She began trying not to laugh while her partner was looking at her interestingly. "Sam bought a new muffler for his car. Eric showed us his new gadget that only Nell appreciates. That's pretty much it."

"How about you?"

"Uhm, I don't think I have something to tell."

They looked at each other. Deeks knew apology was needed so he brought it up.

"I'm sorry."

"Sorry? For what?"

Feeling uneasy, Deeks ran his fingers through his hair. "For ignoring you."

Kensi smiled. "I understand. Believe it or not, I know what you're going through."

He remembered how she was left by her fiancé one Christmas morning. "Jack?"

She nodded.

"How did you do it? Made it through, I mean."

"It wasn't easy. There's no right step to follow or take for you to move on. No one can say that you have to do this or that for you to feel better. It's all up to you. Me? It took me months before I chose to let go of him and the idea that he was gone, that he left me. I can only do so much for a person, Deeks, and if me loving him after everything wasn't enough for him, there's nothing I can do." Kensi explained, startled at the recognition that the mention of her ex-fiancé didn't bring the usual pain at the memories it always brought whenever she talked about him.

Deeks nodded his head, giving her words a thought. He stared at her and smiled, feeling grateful that she was there for him.

His relationship with Kensi was complicated. When he became a liaison officer of LAPD at NCISOSP and was partnered with her, he knew she doubted his competence to protect her and watch her back at first. Deeks can't blame her, he too had apprehensions why he was chosen to be part of an elite federal group. He was an ordinary undercover detective, although he was good at what he does, he wasn't the best.

Over time and some seriously solved cases later, he had proven to her and to the entire team that he can work with them. It was hard, NCISOSP was a tightknit group and being one of the newest members, there were times he left like he didn't belong there. But he didn't give up, he showed them he was a good cop and a better undercover detective.

And now, Deeks knew that they trust him and he trust them too. He earned their respects and Kensi became one of his dear friends and not just a partner. Who would have thought that after how they banter and bicker almost everyday, they will develop a friendship that only the two of them can understand? It was friendship like no other, he believed. And he was very thankful for it.


End file.
